Nearly a month of not blogging. I got all busy with Christmas stuff and Twitter and bowties and it all got a bit… confusing. And on top of that, I didn’t have much to discuss. Usually I do a bit of an end of year blog on here, but really, this year, with college and such, I’ve only really blogged about major events anyway, so most of what I’d say has already been documented…

2011 started crap, then got good, then really good, before sinking to crushingly terrible, before steadily climbing up and up and up, and then, having a bit of a shortfall over Christmas. I think that one sentence sums up my entire year. Made a few new friends, lost a few old friends; college drama – the usual.

Christmas itself was rubbish. I went away to Yorkshire with the family. Annoying doesn’t even begin to cover it. But when I got home on the 27th, things rapidly took a turn for the better with Mat, various parties, and other good shinanigans! And since then, things have been brilliant!

Anyway, so here’s something I was thinking about today in Ancient History. I’m sitting in my bedroom on my laptop writing a blog, and then its gonna get beamed through space and wires and stuff, and it’ll end up in a warehouse in a server somewhere. I don’t even know where WordPress’ servers are… but what if, in two and a half thousand years, someone finds that server, and then this very blog is the subject of conversation for some scholarly chaps somewhere, like those diaries they find from Ancient Romans. Slim chance I know, and very little for scholarly debate over, but its an odd thought… if anyone in the future does read this; hi!

Here’s another thought from me; friendship. Its so confusing. Especially at my age. Aristotle reckoned there were 3 kinds of friendship:

1. Friendship for utility – Being friends with someone because its mutually useful.
2. Friendship for pleasure – Being friends with someone because you enjoy someone for having the same interests as you etc.
3. Friendship for friendship’s sake – Thought to be the strongest type of friendship because its loving someone for who they are, not for any reason other than that.

I read about those a while ago, and I’ve been thinking about them a lot lately because of various reshufflings in the state of my friendship groups.

Near as I can tell, a lot of people at college are friends simply for political reasons; if one person is particularly popular then it makes sense to stay close with them as you become popular by association, and falling out with that person, even if they are particularly nasty and you can clearly see this, is something which must be avoided at all costs. Also, the way people are ‘civil’ to those they dislike is part of the same family; a lot of people I know take this approach with their social lives, and frankly, I’ve never understood it… I don’t see why it benefits anyone to act as if you’re friends with someone when actually both you and they know that you don’t like them. I suppose maybe people don’t want to be seen to be unreasonable or bitchy for disliking the people they dislike? I certainly don’t think I’m above behaving like this, and I don’t think I can think of a single person who doesn’t behave in much the same way…

Then friendship for pleasure. I don’t think I have any friends who are my friends only because I share mutual interests with them, because mostly, I like being able to talk about loads of stuff with my mates, rather than just one or two specific subject areas.

The last one is the one I like most. I think me and Aristotle have something in common with thinking thats the strongest kind of friendship. If I really think hard about it, probably only a handful of my friends fall into that last category. I know without even having to think about it which those people are.

And another thing you need to take into account is random chance. Of course it isn’t actually random, but it seems random sometimes… like, one day everyone is disliking one person, and then someone thinks about it and they decide to forgive this one person on a whim, and if you don’t keep up with that rapid change in liking/disliking, then you can end up on the recieving end of the distaste which was once being heaped at another person… and then linked into that is friendship loyalty, if your friend hates someone then more than likely you’ll come to have that view as well. Confusing times.

The problem is that the word ‘friend’ is so ill-defined. I’m pretty sure that no one would ever say that a ‘Facebook friend’ is the same as a ‘real life friend’. What even constitutes a friend? My Gran says that she hates most of her ‘friends’, and yet you see people who claim to ‘love’ all of their friends, do Facebook friends count in that? And then what about people who claim to be friends, and then spend such a lot of time bitching about someone behind their back, and are as nice as pie to their faces?!

I suppose, at my age, when at college and surrounded by loads of different people everyday ‘friendship’ is easier to come by, all in all though, I think its mainly a case of sorting the wheat from the chaff and then you can grow up and fly away from the chaff and take the wheat with you. And then make some bread with it. Don’t bake your friends though… or eat them… or put them out for the birds…

Well I think I’ve got that knot of disjointed and complicated thoughts out of my head for the time being, so I’ll draw this to a close here… And before I go, here’s a picture highlighting how unusual and bizarre friendship can be…

What are everyone elses thoughts on the subject?

Jack out.

I’m having a crisis.

I’ll explain: yesterday, I performed my A level drama coursework piece in front of a live audience. I haven’t performed in front of a live audience since my AS level final drama exam last summer. And I loved it.

And now I’m worried that I’m never going to do it again. Ever since I was a kid, I’ve wanted to be an actor. I love being on stage, I love making short films, I love the whole world of show business. And in high school, it seemed like a reasonable goal for me to want to be an actor. But then I came to college and was confronted with many people who are better than me. And then it was like, ‘Oh, shit, I can’t do this, quick, think of something else!’

So I’ve aimed at being a writer. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love writing and I can see myself doing it for the rest of my life and not being depressed at that. But I don’t know… the stage just makes me feel on top of the world.

I’ve come to accept that I’m no star. My friend Hollie is brilliant. She’s a true star, and I think she’ll be one of those people who becomes a household name. And as for me… I’m a fairly poor actor if I’m honest. I was told by my drama teacher ‘you have a tendency to default back to your comfort zone’ and my comfort zone is just being myself. Seriously, pretty much every character I’ve played recently has been me to varying degrees; flamboyant, camp, loud.

I was listening to my iPod before and it really upset me because it was just like ‘I wish I could sing about my problems like that!’ And ok, I could, but then people would be like ‘Jack, can it, you sound like a dying walrus!’

Eurgh… normally writing blogs about the things that upset me helps me find a way to solve my problems but this one is just… not going away… I’m going to stop now, because I’m just upsetting myself even further…

Jack out.

In the last eight hours I’ve had my head in the toilet puking my stomach up six times. Its got the point where I’m no longer even sure what I’m throwing up, because there isn’t anything left to vomit. So yeah, another sick day, another set of sick day blues.

When I was a kid I used to like having sick days; lazing around in bed all day, eating soup, taking my quilt downstairs to watch TV. But now I hate them. Frankly, I’ve had 4 sick days so far this term, followed by 4 days in New York, and 2 days away visiting universities. I can’t afford to lose any more time. This year is probably one of the most important in my life and I don’t want to have it all fucked up because I’m too ill to go to college. Eurgh.

But yeah, that is the situation and there’s very little I can do to change it so I figure I might as well make the most of having the free time and do something with it. But I’m procrastinating instead.

I thought, I’ll cheer myself up by writing a blog about turning eighteen and all the happy shinanigans that have come since then! So here goes!

I turned eighteen two weeks ago today. I didn’t have to go to college and do my normal lessons on my birthday either, because I was on the university trip that I mentioned a moment ago! We were off to see Warwick and Royal Holloway Universities to see if any of the drama gang fancied applying for them. I’d already sent off my applications to both of them, so it was a little too late for me, but I was able to have a look round and get a feel for the places which was helpful!

The day started early. Earlier than my Thursday mornings are supposed to, because I’m only meant to start college at 12.15 on Thursdays, which I’ve completed failed to do for the last few weeks, but that aside, I got to college and received a phone call from my lovely boyfriend, Mathew, telling me that he’d passed his driving theory test, so I was very proud of him, and since he was in town anyway, he walked up to college to see me before I left on this trip. It did make me feel a lot better about going since I was a bit upset that he wouldn’t be there with me on my birthday, but seeing him that morning made it ok!

So then we set off in the college mini bus and headed down to Warwick University. On the way there was banter about my friend Addie’s Canadian (Irish) accent, how the teacher Lee ‘didn’t look impressed’, and how we were all planning to get drunk that night to celebrate my eighteenth after being expressly told there was to be no alcohol on the trip!

Warwick University was nice, its quite remote though, but there seemed like there was plenty to do on campus so I don’t think I’d hate it if I did go there!

After that we went to our hotel and out to the famous town of Stratford Upon Avon which you may know as the birthplace of Shakespeare and home to the world renowned theatre group; The Royal Shakespeare Company. We ate tea in a nice little pub across from said theatre company, where I was NOT bequeathed a Pimms and Lemonade by my friends Tom, Rob and Binary Rob! Then we went to see this play called ‘Written on a Heart.’

It wasn’t terrible actually. The play was written to celebrate the 400th anniversary of the King James Bible being written, but that’s not really what it was about. It was more about the process of translation itself; what would be the effects of changing the word ‘congregation’ to ‘church’ and so on, maybe the answer is the obvious ‘nothing’, but maybe changing that one word would create a ripple effect and change lots of other things! Being set at the time of the Tudors’ church reformations, the play also broached the question of the nature of religion and the right way to worship, whether it is best to keep things simple as the Puritans believed, or glamourize religion with golden chalices and the like as the Roman Catholics believed. It was quite an interesting play and a lot better than I thought it’d be. If you find tickets for it on the cheap and have nothing else to do, I’d certainly recommend a trip to see it, it is quite an eye opener!

That evening I was ushered back to the hotel along with Addie, Lauren and Rachel while all the boys and my best friend Hollie, and our beloved drama teacher Jenny set out in search of a Tesco. Upon their return a small party was held in my room with the spoils of their trip; namely many packets of sweets, a bottle of Coke, and a cake! It was a really nice gesture on their part and it made me really happy to have friends who’d go out of their way to celebrate my birthday like that!

The next day, was Rememberance Day so we had a minute of silence in the mini-bus on the motorway and all read out the lyrics from a song about the war to mark the moment. It was the first time that Rememberance Day has ever really made me feel anything, and stopping and taking the time to remember those who died for our country was really nice.

Royal Holloway was great too! I can’t really be bothered going into much detail about it, but I did like it more than Warwick!

The journey home was populated by many more in-jokes and general banter which was really cool, but wouldn’t make sense if you weren’t there so I won’t bother to explain it.

*At this point in the blog I fell asleep from illness, then when I woke up, I was too busy throwing up to continue it, so yeah, we’ll leave it there. It was written 24th of November at 10.23am!*

I figured I’d better write a quick blog to comment on my last day of being seventeen. Especially since, as of tomorrow, I am, in a legal sense, a man. On a personal level, I don’t really think I’m anywhere near.

I don’t really think there’s a lot I can do when I turn 18. Sure I could buy alcohol and cigarettes but I don’t smoke and I try to avoid drinking wherever possible. I’m legally allowed to star in pornography, but frankly I don’t see that happening either, not least because I’m not attractive enough. I can go clubbing, but only about 3 of my friends are 18 so I have pretty much no one to go with…

But yeah, the big day is ready to greet me in 32 minutes. So, 32 minutes left to craft a nice little blog on my musings about my last day of being 17… I’ll probably do a bigger post when I actually turn 18… probably on Friday evening if I remember, since I’m away for the actual day, or maybe after my party in the early hours of Sunday morning…

ANYWAY! Down to the point. Today wasn’t so different from most days of my life. I got up, got dressed, had breakfast, brushed my teeth, caught the bus, went to college, etc. I did do some other stuff as well though, which is what I’ll go into now!

I directed my college’s theatre group for a session since the teacher who usually does it was away. I felt that I handled the task maturely and responsibly and we made a good amount of progress while balancing both fun and work. Maybe I really am on the road to maturity… what a scary thought!

Then I spent a good proportion of the evening out and about in the city centre with my boyfriend who’d come in to see me specially which was nice of him. We didn’t really discuss anything in particular, but it was nice. It was nice to hold Mat’s hand the way I first did 354 days ago. Oh yeah, it’ll be a year in 11 days. Dunno whether I mentioned that. I’m quite excited! Still need a plan of what to do for it though…

I’ve just been thinking to myself. On this day last year, I was still in the midst of plans to get my ex back. And then 11 days after that I inexplicably happened to meet the sweetest, most wonderful guy I’ve ever met and I ended up happy with him instead. How life does enough throwing those cheeky curveballs! Mat might not be perfect to anyone else, but he is perfect for me. He’s just the perfect balance for me. We’re an odd couple, but we’re so good for one another!

I also watched Glee, the subject matter of the episode was losing your virginity. I enjoyed it. Though it made me sad to think that some people don’t have a loving first time… I mean, I get it, for many people that won’t be an issue, and if that’s their view then fair play to them, but I’m so glad that I don’t regret my first time. I always said I’d wait until I was ready and in a stable loving relationship (I know, prudish) and it paid off. Happy happy.

Finally, I spent a bit of time discussing complicated matters with one of my best friends. All very vague I know. I don’t know how much of it is public knowledge, and besides, it isn’t my news to spread so I’ll leave it there. It did make me realise some important stuff about stuff though. Still vague. Sorry…

So yeah, I’d better get to bed. I’m going on a huge overnight trip to visit both Warwick University and Royal Holloway University, with a stop at Stratford on Avon (yes, that one, the birthplace of Shakespeare) to see a Royal Shakespeare Company production tomorrow! Exciting! Plus its my birthday. Obviously. Excited about that. Bit worried. It’ll pass. Wish me luck. Once more unto the breach!

Jack out.

So, I’ve been told to dedicate the next blog I write to Hannah, who is hilarious simply because of her impression of a horny first year from college who she saw! This impression is genuinely one of the funniest things I have ever seen, as it caused me to weep with laughter in McDonalds!

Anyway, onwards with the actual blog! I haven’t blogged in a while have I? Well in all fairness, I’ve been ridiculously busy and overworked… honestly, I probably shouldn’t be taking time out of my busy schedule to be writing this one, but hey! I’m too tired to do any proper work so a blog will do.

Where to begin… well, where did I leave off? I think I was just about to go and see You Me at Six live? Well, I did that. Unfortunately, two days before I contracted a nasty case of tonsilitis, which meant that I had to stand at the back in the concert and not sing along to anything… but it was still awesome! And my wonderful friend Sophie looked after her, so major gratitude to her for that!

Anyway, that week, from Monday to Thursday I was off college in bed, doing a combination of sleeping, watching TV on iPlayer and playing Pokemon on my DS. It was horrible, just horrible. I woke up every night, sometimes multiple times because as soon as the painkillers I took before bed wore off it’d start to hurt everytime I swallowed, which would wake me up, so then I’d have to take more painkillers, wait half an hour for them to kick in, then go back to sleep and wait for the cycle to begin again. It was very tedious indeed. But luckily, by Friday I was well enough to get back to college and catch up on some stuff that I really couldn’t afford to miss!

It was also lucky because that Sunday morning at 4am, I was roused from my sleep to get a taxi to go to Manchester Airport. Where was I headed? Well, in case you live under a rock, and haven’t ‘got’ the title of this blog yet, I was on the road (or y’know… sky) to New York City!

And how was it? Awesome. I can quite honestly say that I have never been to a better city. Maybe even a better place full stop. The things that the chorus of ‘Empire State of Mind’ promise are certainly delivered in full force! I’ve never been quite so inspired by a place to make my dreams come true. New York City summarises everything that I want out of life; its fast paced, its exciting, there’s always something going on, its classy, its bright, its colourful. I could describe it with a million words, I could show you all the pictures I took, but you still wouldn’t know what I mean. The city has this… energy, thats the only way I can describe it. Its like a buzz from all around that just makes you wanna sing and dance!

It’s like, sometimes when I’m wandering around my hometown, I kind of feel out of place, as though I got accidentally dumped here and I’m wandering around on an alien planet… don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love where I live, and my local town (technically a city but I always think of it as a town) but I still have that feeling. But in New York? Well, I still felt out of place, and yet, it kind of felt like I’d found my place at the same time. It was as though everyone in that whole city was out of place, and because they were all out of place together, they all kind of fit together… its weird and difficult to explain, but yeah, that’s the best effort my tired brain can make.

The Unova region from the Pokemon franchise is based on New York City, and the thematic motif of the region is being united despite peoples differences, which makes SO much more sense when you’ve actually been to New York. So if you’re a Pokemon fan, there’s the best Pokemon based explanation I can give.

I think the New York trip was definitely improved by all the amazing events and experiences which I was lucky enough to have while I was there, so just so I’ve got a note so I don’t forget, I’ll run through the major stuff we did:

• Went to the top of the Empire State Building
• Wandered around Time Square lots of times.
• Took a ferry trip around Liberty Island to see the Statue of Liberty.
• Ate at Ellen’s Stardust Diner.
• Watched the off-Broadway performance of Rent.
• Explored Central Park where I ate a corndog!
• Shopped at the Nintendo World Store.
• Saw various celebrities.
• Walked up and down 5th Avenue lots of times.
• Was ridiculously impressed by Spiderman the musical on Broadway.
• Sang and danced to a Wicked number with instruction from the Broadway Wicked’s sexy dance captain.
• Made loads of new friends and became closer to old ones!

And I think that’s all… the last one is probably the most important… so much love for Danny and Rob who I shared a room with, and who woke me up with their own rendition of ‘Good Morning New York’ every morning… absolute insanity! We planned a sitcom called ‘New York Calling’ which would be like a more camp version of Friends! The basic plot is that me, Danny, and Rob relocate from Preston to New York after getting jobs as a Broadway Star, a Good Morning New York Host, and a porn star respectively! We’ve actually planned about 30 episodes of it. We were all joking about it for the whole trip, but I was secretly wishing that my life was like our planned sitcom…

So yeah, my beautiful friends from New York, Danny, Rob, Natalie, Heather, Rachel, Asha, and Ducky need a shout out for just generally being amazing people! I’ll NEVER forget the amazing times we had! Hope I haven’t forgotten anyone off that list…

And then I came back from New York… and everything got a little bit more… drudgery-y… actually, thats a lie, because there was one huge bonus to returning from the city that never sleeps, and that was that I was back in the same country as my lovely Mat! Knowing that I had someone so wonderful to return to lessened the pain of coming home somewhat! Hopefully when we’re older, we can go back as a couple, maybe even buy an apartment and become stars! Mwahahahahaa!

So what else have I done? Half term was fairly enjoyable; a few of my friends and I went up to the Lake District because… well, I don’t really think there was much of a reason, it was just a bit of a jaunt! That was crazy and ended up being one huge bitching session up a mountain. High altitude just makes the bitching happen even more!

And then back to college. And yeah. Stress. In drama, we’re trying to devise an original piece of theatre based on the work of these practitioners and we can’t seem to find a single way of doing something that is both good and pleases all members of the group, so that’s stressing me out. Then in English I’m supposed to be writing an essay for coursework on a books and poems which have barely been taught since our teacher has been off cos of injury. Because of both tonsilitis and the New York trip I’ve missed a total of 9 hours worth of Ancient History lessons so I have all that to catch up on as well as keeping up with what we’re doing in class now.

Then I’ve just had an exam on Wednesday morning for Oxford University, who I’ve got to submit some work to by next Thursday as well. And Royal Holloway are asking for 4 pages of creative writing from me.

And I’m supposed to have finished the first draft of my script by now.

And I’m trying to organize my birthday party and what me and Mat are doing for our anniversary.

So yeah, stressful.

I know it isn’t just me either! I know that probably just about everyone my age is starting to feel a similar strain of balancing social life, education, work, family, and god knows what else! I wish people would just cut us a bit of slack to be honest…

But no, that’s not going to happen. Still, beggars can’t be choosers and sinners never sleep, so we’ll power through it and hopefully come out the other side with lots of happiness and a good life!

In positive news, I got my first offer from a university last night…

Jack out.

Never done one of these before but I thought hey! Why not! So today I’m gonna be reviewing ‘Sinners Never Sleep’ (if you hadn’t guessed by this blog’s title) the new album by my favourite band You Me At Six. Also, I’ll state here that all views here are mine and therefore subjective! Although I would be interested to know what you think, and whether you agree or disagree! So, shall we begin?!

1. Loverboy. I think just about everyone has heard this one by now with the amount that its been on the radio. I really like it. Its sort of fun and upbeat, but it is a bit heavier than what you’d expect if you were thinking Sinner’s Never Sleep would be similar to Hold Me Down. Yeah, I know a lot of reviewers have said that its a bit of trail into where the album is going, but it really is. In all honesty, I don’t think there could have been a better opening song really… my only problem with it is a comment that Josh gave about it in an interview, where he said he basically strung the lyrics together because they sounded good, but the song has no meaning… I found that a bit disappointing; I do like my music to have some meaning behind it, but then again, for what is it, Loverboy is a great song!

2. Jaws on the Floor. Now, while I wouldn’t say that this song left me peeling my jaw off the floor, it is a good song. It’s just that ever so slightly bit heavier than Loverboy, but its in a similar vein. This one seems a bit more angsty and powerful, and I really like that about it, but at the same time, it is light enough to entice in those listeners who (like me) aren’t usually into more metal kinds of music. Yeah its a good song. Not what I’d call a GREAT song, but its good.

3. Bite My Tongue. Oh this song. I think its absolutely wonderful. Mostly. Its the autobiographical song of You Me At Six’s near break up during the recording of Sinner’s Never Sleep, and as such you can really feel how much the band are putting into it. I predict that this one will be a single… my major criticism is the same criticism which Twitter suggests that many are sharing – Oli Sykes. He’s just awful. I cringe when I hear his voice – there was no reason for his appearance on this song, or this album for that matter. He’s terrible. I always fin myself skipping past it when he starts singing…

4. This Is The First Thing. The leaked song. I really really like it. I don’t know whether its just because its a bit lighter than the three tracks preceeding it, or I just like the slower songs, but its a welcome refrain from what we’ve heard so far on the album, and shows off a different side to You Me At Six. If I had to pick one track on the album which really showed how much Josh’s voice has grown and developed since Take Off Your Colours, it’d be this one. I just think its brilliant. Its a properly autumnal song. In fact, I think if I had to match Autumn 2011 to a song, this would be it. I don’t even know what I mean by that, but I think its great! One of my favourites of the whole album!

5. No One Does It Better. I really like this one too. The lyrics are just satisfying somehow, its almost as though you can feel where the song is going, and then when it does, then you feel all good about it. And yet, despite that, its a song that surprises you by throwing in the odd curveball. Towards the end, you get a very different song than you started with, and its somehow fitting, because all through the tune we’ve been experiencing this rising and falling sense of emotion, and then it just bursts out at the end and its great!

6. Little Death. I don’t understand the point of this song. I don’t get what its trying to do. The music is good, the lyrics are frankly appalling. It makes no sense. It isn’t a bad song, but its not a good one either. There’s nothing to say about it. It’s mediocre.

7. Crash. I absolutely adore this one. Its probably either my favourite, or second favourite song on the album. If you liked ‘Fireworks’ or ‘Always Attract’ then I think you’ll be a fan of this one. In fact, this song plays almost as a bit of a sequel to ‘Always Attract’, and there’s actually a line which makes explicit reference to that song, and that made me feel a little bit happy since ‘Always Attract’ is one of my favourite songs of all time… but back to ‘Crash’! Its marvellous! Its slow, melancholy, and poignant. ‘Crash’ has been placed just about perfectly in the album; if it was any further towards the beginning, it’d seem a bit depressing and out of context, and if it was any further back it’d be one of those songs that’s too long to bother listening to. Its a song about growing apart from someone and longing to have them back, and it definitely captures that mood and spirit, yet it isn’t without a sense of hopefulness which is always welcome in less upbeat songs.

8. Reckless. Much more upbeat than ‘Crash’ so it pulls you back to reality in a way. Its a bit samey and its not anything we haven’t heard from You Me At Six before. ‘Reckless’ is by no means a bad song, but it isn’t really one of the album’s stand out tracks… the guitar on it is pretty cool though!

9. Time Is Money. This one is back to You Me At Six’s new heavier sound and bloody hell, how angry does Josh sound?! I’d say its arguably the heaviest track on the album, and as such, its not exactly to my taste… that’s not to say I dislike it, but if I had to delete a few tracks off the album, this one would go. Also, I dislike Winston McCall’s bit on it. In fact, I dislike it so much that it seriously puts me off this track. I’ll be controversial here and say that I think Winston McCall on ‘Time Is Money’ is probably worse than Oli Sykes on ‘Bite My Tongue’. There’s no question of Mr McCall being as cringeworthy as Sykes, but at least you can hear what the latter is singing about…

10. Little Bit of Truth. I quite like this one. Its slower and more relaxed than its predecessor, but in a different way to ‘Crash’… its a nice song. Its just a nice song. Its the type of song you’d play over a romantic dinner, just as a bit of ambient music. The band is at top notch here and they sound fabulous! It’s a love song, but it’s a love song in a subtle way. If we take ‘Always Attract’ as that fourteen year old who thinks they’ve figured out love after a week of dating someone, ‘Little Bit of Truth’ is more like a twenty something who’s come through bad relationships and has been knocked down a peg or two, and yet has finally found true love.

11. The Dilemma. This is my other contender for my favourite track on the album. I think it’s great! And yet, I couldn’t tell you why I think so! I just think it’s a properly good song! It’s a fun, upbeat ballad about the highs and lows of a relationship and its just a great song! Definitely one that you could get up and dance to if it came on at a party! Remember before, when I said ‘No One Does It Better’ had satisfying lyrics, well ‘The Dilemma’ is exactly the same! It’s actually not the shortest track on the album (well, it nearly is) but it definitely feels like the shortest. My only criticism is that it left me wanting more!

12. When We Were Younger. I do like this song, don’t get me wrong, but its placing as the album’s last song is utterly bizarre. It just feels weird… whereas ‘The Dilemma’ noticing how short it was, this one has me noticing how long it is. It feels like self-indulgent overkill if I’m honest. It would have been perfectly suited to be the second to last song on the album, but at the back of the pack, it feels jarring and odd. You feel like there’s a place that this song is trying to get to, but it never quite manages to get there. All that said, it is a good song! It’s a bit more mournful and thought provoking than the other tracks and so it’ll leave you thinking. Maybe that was the intention. Still, I would be tempted to replace this with ‘Jaws on the Floor’ in the line up.

13. (iTunes Bonus Song) Takes One To Know One. This one is similar to ‘No One Does It Better’ in that it starts out as one song, and finishes as another. I actually think the people who bought the album of iTunes are lucky because this is a much better ending to Sinners Never Sleep than ‘When We Were Younger’! However, the song is still a bit ‘Hold Me Down’ and whereas that’s no bad thing necessarily, I just feel like You Me At Six could have done better… Its a good song, but its clear to see why it wasn’t put on the disk release! That said, I do absolutely LOVE the climactic close to the tune!

14. (Not technically on the album, but diehard fans will probably have downloaded it as well since its the B-Side to Loverboy). Moon Child. Don’t let the title decieve you. If you judged it by that, you might be fooled into thinking that this is a relaxed, calm song, maybe a love song. It is pretty much the opposite. I’ll be honest, I’m not a huge fan. The lyrics are crass, angry, and in all honesty, just come across as a bit cringeworthy. It’s not quite bad, but I’d place it just a little below being ‘alright’. I’m really glad it wasn’t included on the album… its a bit rubbish. If anyone watched the first series of Torchwood, when they were trying to say ‘we’re adult’ by including stupid amounts of sex, swearing and gore; this song is You Me At Six’s equivalent. It sounds as though this was one of the earliest tracks written for Sinners Never Sleep and they were almost trying to prove to themselves and the world that they’re more hardcore than they are.

So, to summarise, Sinners Never Sleep is a great album! There are one or two tracks which let it down a little, but those which don’t really do shine and more than pick up the slack! If I had to criticize one point about the album, I’d say that the whole trend for repeating a few lines over and over and over and over again at the end of the song becomes a little tiresome. I think it happens on just about every track, and has happened on just about every track that You Me At Six has ever produced… however, don’t let that put you off! Sinners Never Sleep is a step forward for You Me At Six and I think it’s definitely paid off! Its slightly odd (in a good way) for me as a fan, because its partly what I know and love, and partly a whole new style being introduced to me which I’m coming to love! There’s definitely a lot of worse ways to spend £9.99 (or £12.99 if you fancy a You Me At Six DVD as well?) and on the music scene at the moment, I don’t think there’s many better ways to spend your money actually!

So, what do you think? Have you got the album yet? Are you planning to get it? What’s your favourite song? Least favourite? Share share share!

Jack out.

Hello blog readers!

Well, we’re well and truly in Autumn now aren’t we?! I love autumn! It is by far my favourite time of the year! I love the orange leaves, and the grey skies, and the cold mornings, and the dark nights… I’ve always found myself enjoying this time of year more than any other. Plus there’s all the fun stuff; Halloween, Bonfire Night, my birthday, and of course, this year, me and Mat’s anniversary! So yeah! Autumn is a very special time of year for me!

Just a brief word on the title of this blog, it is actually slightly related to autumn… its a lyric from You Me at Six’s leaked song ‘This Is The First Thing’. As my readers will know, You Me at Six are my favourite band and from what has been released/leaked of their new album, Sinners Never Sleep, it sounds like its gonna be a belter! I know I shouldn’t condone leaked music, but I’m going to see them live only a few days after the new album is released, so I figure that I need to know as many of the lyrics of their new songs as possible before I go if I have any chance of singing along! So any head start is worth it! Plus, I’ve already bought the new album, so its not like I’m stealing or anything! Oh, and the link to autumn is that the gig I’m going to is in October… tenuous, but hey!

Anyway, back to the autumnal blog! I can’t really just spend a whole blog talking about autumn can I? No. What I want to talk about is the journey… I’m gonna warn you all, that this is likely to get pretty pretentious, so if there’s any Holden Caufield’s out there, feel free to go find something else to read!

It’s just something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. A journey to what? Well I suppose that depends on you. When I think about it, I think about my journey as a person, through adolescence, through my relationship, through education, through anything really. But journeys are important. I’m sure any good writer will tell you that all the best characters are those that go on a journey of some form.

I started thinking about this because of autumn actually. I was thinking, if we’re going by pathetic fallacy, what stage would autumn represent on a person’s journey. Coldness, darkness, an ending? Perhaps. But for me, I think to see it as a reaffirmation of a person’s goal. Spring is easy going, all sunny and nice and warm, albeit with the occasional shower, and then summer is hot, and dry and difficult, but then autumn? Its a relief after the hot summer, its nearing the end of a journey, the goal has nearly been reached, and this is where it maybe gets a bit more difficult, and its easy to lose sight of your goal, but if you can brave it through autumn then its like saying ‘yeah, I want this, I’m going to get this.’

And while I write this, I’m thinking of one journey in particular. Me and Mat. Tomorrow we’ll have been together for ten months, and it just seems… wow. We have had major ups and downs. There have been times when our relationship has hurt me so much I have literally wanted to stab myself just to get out of it, and yet, when I look back, I don’t regret it. I have never loved anyone so much or so hard. Its easy to tell someone that you love them when there’s no problems, but it means so much more if you can tell someone that you love them, when you’re wishing that the ground would swallow you up. I wish I could tell him to move a little closer, but I don’t need to because he’s already there. I’m sure people will see this and think I’m an idiot kid. And they’re probably right. But hey! If I’m an idiot kid who feels happy with this guy, then that’s fine with me.

And then there’s my other journey. I’ll be 18 in less than two months, and I’m not sure what I’m meant to do with that. Technically I’ll be an adult, and I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel about that. I see my friends turning 18 with parties and happiness, and maybe I’ll feel more like that closer to the time, but at the moment, it makes me sad. There’s a big wide world out there, and it makes me so small. It’s like, when you’re a kid, and you say ‘When I grow up I’m gonna…’ but look at me! I’m nearly there and I have no idea…

But still! That’s life! I’m happy now. That’s what counts!

Jack out.

Hello blog readers!

I wanna write about love! I want to write about love because it’s big and stupid and it makes no sense to anyone, and I don’t understand it! But it’s something that touches everyone so why not write a blog about it?! I chose that picture because when I typed in ‘love’ I could only find straight couples, and so I wanted to do something different! Although, considering the fact that this is my blog, its probably exactly what you expected!

It’s weird isn’t it that only a few years ago, no one believed that there was such a thing as gay love. It was just gay sex. But no, those people were wrong, and now we can all be happy!

So blog title? Lyrics from one of Ellie Goulding’s ‘rare’ songs called ‘Who Want To Find Love?’ I thought it was good, because I of what we’ve been discussing in drama how love is an intangible concept – you can’t go to the shop and buy a bottle of love, and more and more I seem to be seeing people who try to do just that. Try to force there to be love when it isn’t there…

I think Doctor Who summed it up perfectly on Saturday in an episode that made me cry! The Girl Who Waited it was called! Tom MacRae is an actual genius! It was a beautiful episode! Anyway, here’s the quote from Amy talking about her husband Rory:

”Sometimes you meet someone so beautiful, and you actually talk to them and they’re dull as a brick? And then there’s other people and you think; ‘not bad, they’re ok’, and then you get to know them, and their face just sort of becomes them, like their personality is written all over it, and they’re just, they turn into something so beautiful… Rory is the most beautiful man I’ve ever met.”

Its so true and it was such a good quote! That was the bit that made me cry because, I’ll be honest, it is exactly how I feel about Mat. I’ll admit, when I first clapped eyes on him, I didn’t think he was the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen, and he’d say the same about me, but now I know for a fact, with 100% certainty that Mathew is genuinely the most wonderful and beautiful man I have ever ever seen.

I saw someone on Facebook the other night all sad because his love has moved away. I don’t really know him that well but I felt really sorry for him… I dunno… its like, love is just this universal message and once you get it, you just… get it. I don’t know how to explain it…

But then, does anyone? Seriously, think about it – try to define love. It isn’t possible. I can’t even describe the effects of it. It makes me want to laugh and cry and sing all at the same time!

I don’t know what I’m blogging about really… I’ve done the whole ‘love blog’ to death… I reckon I could summarize what I wanted to say in a few lines. Or bullet points. Because bullet points are cool these days.

• Don’t look for love. Look for someone you want to find love with.
• Don’t try to define love, because it isn’t possible.
• Never think you know everything there is to know about love. Because if you ever reach that position; you know nothing about love.

Ooh. I sound preachy now… and stupid. Cos I’m only 17. 17 year olds shouldn’t be preaching. It’s not cool… we should just stick to infantile wailings about how we have no clothes to go out in, and how nobody gets us!!

I am having a dilemma over what to wear tomorrow though… I might just wear my You Me at Six t-shirt! Because I’m seeing them soon! And hopefully meeting them the day before the gig!! EXCITING!! Anyway! I’m going now! Love is good!

Jack out.

I could look back over my blog and how far I’ve come since I started it, but let’s face it, I do that kind of thing pretty much all the time don’t I? So instead, I’m going to discuss my views on the reality of blogging, and internet life in general, and what this blog means to me.

I was thinking this while on the bus the other day. I have a lot of deep thoughts on the bus, but I suppose, that’s because I spend a lot of my life on buses, and there’s rarely ever anyone to talk to, so I have a lot of time for deep thoughts on the bus. But anywho! I was thinking how false people online are.

Personally, I try to be honest on this blog and on Facebook and Twitter and whatever else, but I freely admit to bending the truth, if only slightly. There are certain elements of my life, that I choose to keep away from the public eye. For example, if me and Mat have a fight, it isn’t something that I broadcast to the world. But what is the effect of that? People only see half the story, and so then they form their opinions on something which isn’t necessarily real life.

If you go by what I publically discuss of my life on the internet, then you perhaps get the idea that I lead something of a perfect life, with a perfect relationship, a perfect family, friends who I fall out with from time to time, but by and large I’m a very happy guy. And I’d say that’s very much a generalisation rather than a mistruth. My life is certainly filled with more good than bad things, but that doesn’t mean that the life that I seem to lead is the life which I actually lead…

Its scary to think that so many people are using social networking sites, and so have very similar situations, or perhaps with even greater differences between reality and their front, where their lives are actually a world away from what they seem to be…

Protecting yourself with a veil of pretence is really nothing new, but the danger of technology these days is that you can do it completely unintentionally. And then people form an opinion of you based on something which isn’t quite true, so then they act a certain way towards you because of that, and then it can all spiral outwards like that…

Is there really much to be done though? Honestly, I don’t think so. There are certain aspects of life that you do want to keep to yourself. Sometimes you want to keep things to yourself so that you can pretend that things are really ok when they aren’t; sometimes its easier to allow people to believe things are fine than face up to the fact that they aren’t, and observe the effects of that…

I know that I certainly won’t be revealing it every time I face some kind of obstacle in any part of my life.

So what’s the purpose of this blog then? I’ve just said I don’t intend to make any kind of change in the way I present myself, so what was the point? Well, despite my love for conjecture and speculation as my mind wanders and prods and pokes the way society works as I blog, I’m writing this to say this: My life, and everyone else’s, are not what they seem. I have just as much hassle, drama, and general annoyance as anyone else. When I write about how happy I am, I’m not lying, but I’m not telling you about all the times I’m sad either.

But that said, I think I give you readers a pretty fair generalisation. As I said, by and large, everything is as I tell you. But its the odd bump in the road that I avoid discussing…

The interesting thing to think about now is where would we be if people didn’t keep that stuff to themselves? What if everyone was 100% transparent with their lives? We have it enough at the moment as far as I’m concerned with those people who make up and break up and slag each other off in between all over Facebook. I honestly doubt many people would care, in fact, I’d imagine most would see it as an annoyance…

In summary, is it a good thing or a bad thing? I really don’t know… sure it would make things a whole lot less complicated, and you’d know where you stood with people if everyone was really open about their lives, but it’d take away that mystery and romance and excitement of life… so no, I’m glad people don’t blurt out all of their lives all of the time, I’m glad people keep some stuff to themselves!

I’d rather believe that people are cheerful and happy than miserable and depressed. And if people are miserable and depressed enough to have to talk about it, then that’s when you know you need to be there for them!

Jack out.

I thought I’d use some lyrics from All Time Low’s new album, since I recently bought it off iTunes and I’ve been listening to it LOADS recently! Those lyrics do mean something, but I’m not getting into it on here. Its a pretty good album, I dunno, a lot of critics have criticized it (who’d have thought thats what a critic would be doing eh?) for being too electronic and stuff, and I suppose it is… the lyrics to some songs are frankly shockingly bad, and yet I can’t stop listening to it… its kind of alright music that you can listen to without thinking about in too much detail!

I can’t wait for You Me at Six’s new album though! That should be really good if the first single ‘Loverboy’ is anything to go by! Also, I’m looking forward to the ever dependable Ellie Goulding’s new album. She hasn’t officially announced when its out or anything, but knowing Ellie, it’ll be amazing!

Anyway, back to my discussion of my first day back at college! I have a new tutor and tutor group, and unfortunately my friend Rachel is no longer in it, however, Ella and Michelle still are, so it isn’t all bad news! Hopefully we won’t be hated by this year’s tutor group quite as much as we were by last years… we developed a reputation for being the ridiculously loud and annoying group at the back of class… mainly down to me and Rachel, so perhaps now that she’s no longer part of tutor group that’ll end? Who knows!

My Ancient History class has remained largely the same. Except we lost this guy who was a second year, and we’ve gained some girl from the other class… but the old gang of me, Iona, Jess, Lizzie, and Phill is still together, so all is well!

Then Drama. Drama is the class which has had the greatest change (as far as I know, I haven’t seen English yet) and the one that will affect me most, since its the one class where interaction with other students is technically necessary! My class from last year remain’s largely the same, with the unfortunate loss of a few friends including Asha, and my best friend, Hollie who has been moved to a different class… however, we have also been spliced with half of another class from our year to keep things interesting! To be honest, I’m actually quite excited, especially since we now have 3 more guys, giving us a grand total of 7, compared to the 12 girls! I know most of the new members of the class by the fact that I’m already friends with them, or by association, so its not like they’re all total strangers which is nice!

I like meeting new people so hopefully it’ll be an opportunity to make some new friends? I do hope I don’t come across as TOO irritating…

The worst part of my day? Free periods. There’s been so much drama over summer that I’ve seriously begun to dread spending time with my friends, it isn’t good at all. People who used to be my friends now hate me, and people who I used to be ambivalent to are now gossiping about me and giving me snide looks, and I really hate it. But still, it’ll die down I’d imagine, once we all settle back in!

In other news, my (old, as of today) drama teacher has asked me to write a short play for her to use in the assemblies for the new Year 12′s which is nice! Also, my dog has just been to the vets because he had basically the dog equivalent of a veruca, and so he’s come home with a red bandage on his foot, and a cone around his head to stop him chewing it! He looks very sad, but it’ll make him feel better in the long run so I guess its ok!

That’s all I can think of to write, so I’m off now!

Jack out.